In the 1980s when I married a man I shouldn't have, things were different. I didn't have broad world experience. I only knew what my friends, parents, and church taught me. My world was small but expanding when I met Randy.
I didn't have a pool of friends by then. I'd always been a bit of a loner. It seemed my college friends had all gone their own ways and no one wanted to be a third party to a couple.
Being an introvert, I had a hard time cultivating new friendships. So I fell for Randy's idea that we marry.
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But there was hesitancy. I wanted more and better, but I didn't know how to get it. I didn't know how to let him down and part ways.
These days, women go online to ask for advice from complete strangers. They hear other points of view.
I currently see lots of women who married young and got out of a miss-marriage, or who are going through trials now.
When I was separated in the '80s, Christians didn't talk about divorce. Marriage was supposed to be long-term. Having no confidantes as a young adult was hard. So were my legalistic viewpoints.
So I stayed tethered to Randy though he left me four times--moving his belongings out. I stayed in touch though he didn't want to live with me. I hung on for hope as I thought a Christian was supposed to.
But I needed someone to cut the cord. Living the secret life I did took a lot out of me. It took more than any young woman should have to give.
Read my story in my Amazon Kindle book No More Games. Thanks.